Pregnant and worried that you won’t be a good mom? That’s totally normal mama. Do not think that feeling this way makes you a bad person because you’re not. This fear of not being a good mom, doubting yourself and just plain being scared of being a mom is common.
When you become pregnant, you are so overjoyed and excited to be growing a human inside of you. It’s amazing and life changing. But when things sinks in, you start to think about everything possible about becoming a mom. But most of the time you’re not having positive thoughts. Nope! You’re thinking about the worst case scenario.
It’s what our brains likes to do because it’s protecting us. So you need to tell your brain “Thank you brain for protecting me, but I know I’ll be a great mom”. That’s it!
Is it normal to not want to be a mom while pregnant?
It is normal to have fear of becoming a mom. If you grew up not having a positive image of a good mom, or didn’t have a good happy childhood then those fears may come up for you. Not wanting to become a mom while you’re pregnant is just you being afraid of the unknown and thinking that you won’t doing “right”.
Is it normal to be afraid of becoming a parent?
Yes! if this is your first pregnancy, you are most likely excited to be a mom but also freaking afraid of becoming a parent. You’re going to be raising a human being for crying out loud, of course is scary! But know deep down in your heart that will figure things out and being a parent is not as scary as you might think it is.
5 tips to stop worrying you won’t be a good mom while being pregnant?
1.Write down your feelings
If you’re feeling afraid of being a new mom and taking care of your child, write it down. Grab your journal and braindump your negative feelings and emotions. Then, ask yourself why are you feeling this way. What are the reasons behind your emotions? Did you have childhood trauma? Did you see a movie that traumatized you? Are your friends scaring you? Once you notice why you are feeling afraid of becoming a mom, now you can take action in working towards being excited and confident.
2.Let go of unrealistic expectations
One of the reasons why many pregnant women feel scared of becoming a mom is because they have unrealistic expectations of what a mother is or should do. Society puts so much pressure on moms to be “perfect” and I think that’s killing all of us slowly. The pressure to breastfeed, to sleep train, to do everything alone and not complain, is hard! Let go of the pressure and unrealistic expectation that you have in your mind. Let it go. You are going to be a great mama, feel it, trust it and believe it.
3.You don’t have to be perfect to be a great mom
Yes! Yes! Yes! If you take anything from this post, take this thought “You don’t have to be perfect to be a great mom”. BOOM! I felt you needed to hear that. Because it’s so true. Nobody is perfect right? So putting this pressure on yourself right now being pregnant is only going to make you feel less happy and excited. I want you to LOVE your pregnancy journey right now.
Stop stop believing that you need to have everything perfect, from your nursery, to your baby shower, to your hospital bag. STOP IT! I want you to let go of perfeccionist attitude. This may show up if you’re also comparing yourself to other pregnant women or moms who you feel are perfect and now you need to live up to that. NOPE! You are a great mom already, stop thinking that you need to be perfect.
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Mama you must start trusting yourself right now before you welcome your precious baby into this world. Trust and believe in yourself that you know exactly how to take care of your family. That you know exactly what to do to protect and raise a healthy and happy baby. That you have the answers and nobody else. Trust yourself that you are going to be an amazing mama to your child.
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Listen mama, i know that sometimes all you need is to read a good book that will lift your spirits and help you feel more confident as a mom. So reading pregnancy books, new mom books where you feel more informed about what to expect is of great help to you! Also, ask your doctors questions, talk to your friends and mother, talk with your partner about your feelings. Sometimes just talking it out helps so much.
Checkout these awesome new mom books:
I hope these tips have helped you ease your fears of not being a good mom. You will be an amazing mother, you have to believe that nobody else. You got this mama! If you’re worried you won’t be a good mom, you must acknowledge your feelings and then start creating positive and encouraging thoughts about becoming a mom.
I help moms to feel more confident, in control of their lives and not lose themselves in motherhood. Join my 1:1 private coaching program today and start your motherhood journey with help!
Happy pregnancy mama!